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Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Negligence????

This morning I was waken up by a phone call. It was one of my age old friends. He is working in Taj and he called to ask if I can look out for some house out of city. I was wondering why they would look for a house when they are living in their own house @ Tnagar. Didn’t know if I should ask for the reason or not. But then after few minutes he told there is some problem with his younger brother who is studying in class 10 and wanted to discuss about that.

They found the Jewels missing in the locker when his mom wanted to wear it for her wedding anniversary. After making a thorough check they found a Mortgage bill in Younger ones room. But the bill was signed by someone else. On rushing to that address in the bill he found it was signed by the boys Piano Teacher. They found the boy was addicted to having alcohol and was introduced to it by that teacher. :O Shocking..???
A sum of 25,000 was got by the boy from the mortgage shop. A guy who is doing his 10th drunk for 25,000??? Or the teacher took the whole lot of money and spent few hundreds on this kid for buying alcohol. To keep away this boy from the teacher, parents decided to shift the house somewhere out of the city. But you know what. That boy raises a intelligent question.. “Ma, yenna ma T.Nagar and MM nagar 7 kadal thaandiya irukku?”

This guy was very much in shock and was telling even I myself don’t have the habit of drinking. Yeah, very true being the earning member of the family, none in his family is used to this kind of habit. Whom to blame? The boy? Parents for not paying required attention to the boy? The teacher? I thought shifting the house was not a wise decision. As the boy asked it’s not a big deal getting back to that person again. I was suggesting having an appointment with counselor or psychiatrist. But the boy deliberately refuses to do that also. Is it all because there was none @ home to look after the boy? Negligence by family members?

55 comments:

My days(Gops) said...

aiyo kadavuley...

i thnk he's trying to becum a good indian "Kudimagan"..even, whn ther is a rule "liquor not to be sold under age 18"
oh, though the teacher has to teach everything, he teached this also? really disgusting.....
the total blame goes to the parents, who didnt bother themself to take care of his son....

taking the boy to the counselor or psychiatrist doesnt work...
the parents has to make him realize...

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

Yeah..Ithula irunthu yenna puriuthu.. DONT SEND UR KIDS TO PIANO CLASS :))

Srikanth said...

The brother too shares equal or even more responsibility. after all he knows the possiblities how a guy can move in his teen.. Guess they dont share a close relationship. Coz brothers even discuss abt thiers GFs.

Dinesh babu said...

It is of course the parent's negligence.They should talk to kids more often than just work and earn money and buy stuff for them.

neighbour said...

It may not be the alcohol he addicted too.. I may be the teacher.

Everything happens in todays world. tamil cinemaala thaan yellama kaaturaangalae.. Ex: "thulluvadho illai"

Blame definitely goes to parent who were ruined their son?

I second @gops voice .. counselling will not work its his parents who have to change him.

senthil natarajan said...

parents negligence...of course! n now that he is into it, he has to learn of his own...

kuttichuvaru said...

10th std studentaa?? ayyo ayyo.... enga poguthu namma ooru!! I guess the teacher has taken a big sum frm tat 25000!!

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@Srikanth,
Yeah thts true.. Thts wt I was askin.. how come he didnt know abt his brother. Parents may not know. Thts not a big deal.

@Dinesh,
These days parents are very busy and they think buying things and proper accomodation would do everything.

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Neighbour
Very true. Especially kids learn to talk tit for tat from movies..

@Senthil
He has to learn his lesson. But possibilities are more for him to get into other sick habits as well.

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@Kuttichuvaru
It seems the teacher said so irresponsinbly that "Its ur brother who brought me the Jewels. So better ask him instead of enquiring me"...

Me said...

omg am shocked....

senthil natarajan said...

what i meant was...he is not a kid anymore!!! he may not know the ill effects of drinking, but he is old enough to understand the basic moral values (stealing stuff)
he can be adviced the effects of drinking and if he doesnt listen then at the end of the day its his life... n he is to suffer
n yes we cant blame the teacher, in a practical world that fello just used this guy!!
i sincerly think that a 10 grader is equally at mistake...

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Me
Nice xpreson :P

@Senthil
Yeah agreed. R u taking any Piano classes senthil? :))

Ghost Particle said...

Happy Birthday ponna...never tell me also...

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ GP,
Thanku! Chinna pulla thanama irukumey ;)

bunky jumping pundit said...

i dont think any phychriatrist would be able to help...its parents responsibility to talk to that boy and explain things in a suttle manner. most of the kids are arrogant and don't appreciate an advice from parents but if parents tell them the consequence of excess intake of alchohol...it might lead to a change in his behaviour..the should also try and find out the reason he wants to drink...and probably openly talk him like a friend...

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Bumpy Jumping Pundit
Hahaha Nice nnick. Yeah completely agreed wid u. It seems the boy has no reason, only unwanted freedom is the reason I guess.
Welcome to my blog :)

senthil natarajan said...

me piano?? no
sangeetham n me very far hee hee

ambi said...

My God! really shocking.
i'll blame only the parents. they shud dedicate time for that boy.

Prabhu said...

Dont we have laws that prohibit underage drinking ? or so the teacher should be tried for inducing drinking habits for a 15 yr old...Is there any followup with this case?

smiley said...

At times we have to be strict. Maybe get hold of a friendly cop and get both of them threatened a bit could get atleast his brother back to his senses

My days(Gops) said...

Piano Class anupaama irrundha? ellam sare aagidumo?
btw, neenga intellingent aah? illai brilliant aaah?

he he he
lol...

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Senthil
Hahaha. Okay sangeetham and u very far.. Appo Alcohol and u very near'a??? :))

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Ambi
Yeah..Agreed! Welcome here :)

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Prabhu
Hehehe.. as if ppl follow laws while doing bad or evil things. I thought I should'nt be inquisitve in this issue.. due to other reasons.. I will update if i come 2 know..

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Smiley
Yeah tht sounds a good idea. But sometimes the COP would play his tricks..

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Mydaysarecounted
Ayayo yenna periya varthai ellam pesreenga...Intellegent, Brilliant'na yenna?
Yen brain'ku kedacha Moral athuthan ;) :P Wht moral frm ur perception?

My days(Gops) said...

aiyo..summa thaan keten.....why sudden serious?
i knw only reception....
he he he
lol

Ram said...

The title of this blog answers your question, parents and family members shud behave with their kids like friends, that is the only way to make them speak freely and understand what is gud and what is not? i know some frends of mine who ask their parents about taking a decision on what to reply to a Guy who proposed to her. Like that if parents have a gud rapport with children and brothers with other siblings then this kind of probs will not happen, if they had been like frends the boy wud have asked them what to do ? when the teacher suggested him alcohol. That teacher shud be beaten like hell for spoiling this boy, summava vittaanga avana? Veetuku theriyaama maraikanumnu pasanagaluku thonave koodathu...

Shpriya said...

v v sad. Cant blame the parents alone. It is the prime time when the kid's character gets moulded. The different environments the child is being put to, influences the child a lot. It is high time he is taken to a psychiatrist to avoid trauma in future.

senthil natarajan said...

to be honest i havent tasted it yet! not that its bad or something...just that i din have the drive to drink!!!
2.5 years in aus and not tasted even beer tats a shame i reckon..

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Mydaysarecounted
Hahaha. Not serious.. :)

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Ram
Yeah. Thts true. The teacher must have been beaten but where abouts of money will not be known at all..
Parents and brother must have been more intimate..Agreed!

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Shpriya,
I felt the same priya. But I was told tht the kid says a biiiiiiiig "NO".

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Senthil
Shame???? :O My brother being in US for more than 4years has never tasted any kind of alcohol- beer so far. Tht needs lots of applause.. I dont think there is somthng 2 b ashame..
Unga pokkey sari ilaye :)) Jus kiddin!

NaiKutti said...

Just hoping that this doesn't become a natural fall-out of the fast-paced dynamic life style where relationships aren't given the right amount of time and effort...

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ NK
Yeah very well said. Apt words. Agreed!

reghu nath thooran said...

i do like my drinks but in moderation...i drink maybe once in in a month or so and not more than 3 pegs and i ......i am 40+now....

i started drinking alchohol after i got my first job.......

so i have always smoke or drank with my own earned money....not that it makes it a good thing :)

and i have noticed that espsly. in the south......there is tendency for alcholhism.......dont know why?

Vijay Ramamurthi said...

etho persuma ennalaamo ezhutharenga..
neenga sonna seriyaa thaan irukkum :)

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Regunath thooran
Welcome here :) U r 40+... Thts great. But I wonder, y ppl feel very proud 2 say tht they drink
:-/ In south its more bcoz Yenga Amma- CM madam has made it very easily available in the recent days under the name TASMAK :))

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Vijay Ramamurthi
Hahaha. Escapism???? ;)

Usha said...

Hi, First time here..seriously shocking, aana I have seen classmates who drank in their 9th std only to show off as "dudes" in 10th Std..aana it is quite unfortunate that a teacher encouraged, rather taught, a kid to do this.

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Usha
Yeah. I was shocked too. Hey 9th std students drank 2 show off? Heehehe. Tht sounds funny ;)
Welcome here :)

tamizhan said...

I am not surprised. I am not shocked either. Dunno why. Maybe its because i know the pulse of the generation this boy comes from. I have knowledge of them doing worse things. Much worse. I myself have no right or desire to advise these boys and girls, but i dont think the parents can be held responsible. This thing might have happened under their very nose, with a lot of precautions being taken.

All said and done, as long as their are taboo things in society, they will be done. I am sure, that to the boy, consuming alchohol would have been an act of extreme rebellion. The fact that the elder brother doesnt drink only worsens the situation.

A message to parents: Dont try to teach or preach anything to your kids. They'll go ahead and do it if only to piss you off.

Madhu said...

*sigh* At times, we need to let go of our kids. They must and will learn from their mistakes.

And what's the point in getting a psychiatrist? It's upto the parents to tell the kid about the problems that alcohol consumption can lead to. If they can't do that effectively, I don't think anyone else can.

All said and done, the kid will grow into an adult, who can and needs to choose for himself. pothi pothi valarthu endha proyojanamum illa...

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Thamizhan
Had elder brother had this habit, may be he would have made it out tht his brother is up2 sumting.

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Madhu
Very true! But 'pothi pothi valartha endha prayaojanamum ilaa' can't be acceptd. Somtimes things go wrong. It hapens oter way around. Not all kids who have been taken very much care by parents are like this.

டி ராஜ்/ DRaj said...

Hi Ponnarasi:
Disturbing fact. I did have friends who boozed regularly when they were in 9/10th standard. Who is to be blamed? Perhaps the kiddo didnt have any idea of his family situation as his brother :( Sad....
DRaj

kanniya said...

Interesting ... i guess the problem is both with the parents and the TV/ cinema industry ... with this day and age ... even the KG kids know what tasmark means ... thanks to TV ... it would be best for the parents to educate them abt these things along with the ABC's ... i think it was abt the same age that i got the first and last note from ma mom n dad ... which was like "u get into any more trouble and we disown ya ... so dont bring home any trouble" ... i am not exactly responsible n all but i learnt to aviod a lota trouble

then again legal action can be taken on the piano guy coz he has influenced the minor kid into stealin ... and has aided in the pawning of the stuff ... by the indian law the minor is still @ an advantage ... and the criminal aid can be convicted tho

as for changing the house ... almost every place has a u know what shop so no point in changin the house n all ... best would be a de-addiction center and get the kid a good rehab ..

susubala said...

My God.....iam shocked ! That too b'cos of a Piano teacher !!!!!

Man...we should be really careful with these younger generations ! And its true that when people not around to take care they get into these kind of habits and indeed negligence ! Iam so sad abt it !

Has to be me said...

Hi Princess!

I am a first timer here. This is just toooo shocking for words. Piano teacher nasamapoga. It is so ridiculous to do such things to such a young kid.

I just hate such things happening & wonder where the world is heading.

Check out - http://hastobeme.blogspot.com/2006/03/where-are-we-heading.html

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Draj
9th & 10th.. Hm.. Puthusa irukka ellamey...

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Kanniya
BTW, "u get into any more trouble and we disown ya ... so dont bring home any trouble" More stands for some reason. Which means u have done somtng already..Hehehe. Wt was tht.
Yeah. Going 4 a rehab is a gud sugestion. But lets c wts gonna hapen.

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Susubala
Yeah I was shocked too. Really careful with younger genrtns..Hahah well said.

Ponnarasi Kothandaraman said...

@ Hastobeme
"Nasamapoga" Nalla soneenga ;) But naama solrathellam yenga nadakuthu. Will visit ttht post now..